Monday, December 17, 2007

It's the most wonderful time of the year

to be sick. Really, though, I always get sick around this time of year so I wasn't surprised when my throat started to get scratchy a few days ago. I'm thinking this may have something to do with running down north avenue at 6am in the dark through four inches of snow trying to get to work.

Last weekend we had our new friends, Chris and Amber, over for a fantastic dinner lovingly prepared by my wife. Spinach strata with mashed potatoes and caramelized shallot gravy and garlic and shallot green beans was served with a wonderful new sonoma table red from work followed by a mango and pear pandoutie. Then - beer, lots of beer. In fact I had apparently done a splendid job of hiding the fact that I got entirely shitfaced. (word won't accept that as one word) After a bottle of wine, a bottle of Ommegang, a six pack of anchor christmas beer and a bomber of old suffolk, I think we were talking a little loudly. That paired with the fact that I typically go to bed at 9:30 these days (i know) I was ready for bed.

Because we were only drinking higher-quality ales I woke up feeling fine. In fact, I had remembered that the public sale for Wilco's five day residency at the Riviera Theatre started at ten a.m. I refreshed my browser at precisely ten and was able to score two tickets. I was surprised. I was so surprised that as soon as the transaction was complete I attempted to go back for more but at 10:05, the tickets for all five shows had been spoken for. While I haven't listened to wilco much lately, they are promising to play each song from their catalog during this residency, each night a unique setlist, making me giddy with excitement. Lately I have been excited about Bishop Allen, The National, the soundtrack to I'm Not There, and a number of unreleased early Joni Mitchell demos and bootlegs I recently acquired.

In other news my lovely Xtina and I will be returning to Grand Rapids for a limited three day engagement. The dates will be January 1st, 2nd and 3rd. This will be our christmas trip. The news alarmed my parents causing them to call me no less than three times last night trying to make, presumably, their first online purchase in a rush to have something for us to open on that sacred January second morning.

Saturday, December 08, 2007

maps, maps, maps

Winter is here and with it our first gas bill in which our antique furnace was on in full. We are pleasantly surprised, especially considering the temperature at which we keep this place in comparison to our last cave of an apartment. The windows are sealed and we're ready for the first big storm of the season. We got a few inches last week which temporarily put an end to our bicycle commuting but it won't hold me back for long.

Last night I went to a christmas party thrown by a colleague of mine who was also fired yesterday. In a word, it was awkward. I was back home before midnight.

This week Xtina and i saw the new Noah Baumbach film, 'margot at the wedding.' We're both fans of his first film, 'the squid and the whale.' We found the movie entertaining, albeit a tad overwrought. It reminded me of 'little children' in the acting, subject matter and the two are also confounded by starring Nicole Kidman. I'm trying to get out and see 'I'm not there,' whose soundtrack is great with the exception of a few butchering tracks. I also have to see 'no country for old men' and now 'juno' as well as 'the savages.' We must be rounding the corner to oscar season because I haven't wanted to see so many movies at the same time for as long as I can remember.

To those of you who live in chicago: This week I saw the exhibit 'Maps: finding our place in the world' at the field museum. Simply put, it's really awesome. I spent over three hours in the one exhibit. From the Divinci map to Ptolemy's map of Rome, the Tolkien maps to the maps from the 'golden age of sea trade' in the Netherlands and the native american maps - I was fascinated. I must have been slackjawed the entire afternoon. I even used a map to get there! I'll probably go again. Also in the city: Lewis and Clarke: mapping the american west, a free exhibit at the newberry library. Perhaps I'll go back to school for cartography.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

posting from work again

I've arrived at work early this morning due to Christina's 6am start time and my desire to not ride to work in single-digit wind chills. I guess this is where my quest to ride to work year round ends. Like my early fall determination to keep the heat off until thanksgiving, cold reality has ended my unreasonable aspiration.

Work is fine - these days I spend my early mornings listening to dylan while receiving and ordering cheese, talking about european politics with my bosnian co-worker, and riding to work in the cold (until today). No complaints - still isn't my dream job but I'm thankful for it everyday, especially when I look at area job postings. It certainly has gotten my work ethic back. I no longer spend my days reading boing boing and posting here. I happen to be off the clock right now. I was starting to get worried that my definition of work had changed to be consumed by bordom and internet surfing as opposed to actual labor.

Christina enjoyed the birthday presents I got her including a nice bottle of wine and two vegan cookbooks, one being 'the veganomicon.' We went out with friends in andersonville for some discounted alpha king and one beer too many.

All in all: not too much happening over here. We watched the first two installments of 'the up series' last night. This will be our new obsession.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

greatest weakness - Eczema

It's all over my right hand - all red and itchy, it burns when I put lotion on it. I'm never washing my hands again. It showed up after I rode into work on a cold wet day without gloves.

We had a good weekend last weekend despite the eczema, returning home for the weekend to celebrate our birthdays. Unfortunately, due to work, it will be the last time we return home before the new year. Retail sucks. The new GRAM is great - well, the building is great, they need to do something about their paltry art collection and the way their gallery space is set up only to make the viewer feel lost. While in town we did the usual of seeing nick and jason and eating at marie catribs at least once. Christina's goal of seeing Tim and Anjie's Nathaniel didn't pan out, but maybe it's best she isn't around babies.

Grand Rapids is looking cleaner and more vibrant each time we come. Perhaps the city is actually getting cleaner or perhaps we're getting used to how dirty chicago is. The city doesn't seem to be physically suffering the political problems described by its citizens. I suppose, though, turmoil and downturn is a process and not an event. Whenever I return I want to move back immediately but when I leave I'm not as ready to relocate. I do want to own a house more each time I return. And with home prices as they are in the city (and surprisingly not increasing much) that dream could come true.

Today - figure out what to do with the car as we were rear-ended by a cab last night. We're both okay and the car isn't damaged too much - some dents and bangs in the rear bumper. We went to the california street police station immediately where the officers were surprisingly helpful but the cab dispatcher was expectantly unhelpful and seemingly intoxicated. Now that it's light out, I'll give it a second look.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

where the good lord flung it



After a long vacation we are safe and sound in our surprisingly chilly apartment. We both have the day off and I'm spending the morning catching up on all the latest goings-on in the interweb while xtina is watching 'la haine' in the other room. Unfortunately, our camera (or perhaps the memory card) went completely haywire during the trip and I only have a few photos that I can access without a 'system error' or 'faulty parameter' message which means that while I had the intention of filling this post with stunning photos from our camping excursion and the wedding, I won't be able to do so.

Zach's wedding was fantastic. We're very impressed by kansas city - from what we can tell a hip, recovering urban area with a low cost of living. It was great to see the likes of zach and alex, ben and josiah once again. The road just as exhilarating as I hoped it would be. It had been months since I had traveled faster than forty miles an hour. I never used to get such a thrill out of driving as I do now. I wanted to stop at every oversized plaster dinosaur and tourist-oriented distillery on the way.

Camping went great as well. Highs in the seventies and lows in the fifties made for perfect outdoors sleeping weather. Much of the park was in peak color change season. I wish I had the photos to show you. We hiked over fifty miles and on a couple days hiked over a vertical mile in one hike. We're in better shape than we had expected and are now focused on backcountry camping. We're just a few items short of being prepared to do so. We hiked to the peak of mt le conte despite the mist rushing up the face of the mountain leaving us clutching the wire and on Friday saw a bear in the wild attempting to break into a tent in a backcountry campsite. I was scared and wanted to hide but xtina stood her ground and we watched the bear until it left. We spent some time on the appalachian trail and fantasized about hiking it together. I can hardly imagine how mando felt hiking to clingmans dome, the highest point on the AT and being greeted by senior citizens bus tours and overweight southerners out for a sunday drive in their hummer. Hiking from cades cove to the summit of thunderhead mountain was much more rewarding.

We're back, now, and I can absorb the new radiohead record and get back to work. Today I believe xtina and I might see 'i want someone to eat cheese with' and perhaps I'll see 'the darjeeling limited' with matt and jonathan tomorrow. I'll try and keep you more updated.

Also, while I'm thinking about it; I witnessed an elderly southern woman describe how to use a portable toilet using the phrase 'just let it fly where the good lord flung it.' It was fantastic.

Thursday, October 04, 2007

day off

I'm still around, I simply haven't had much to say as of late. The weeks are passing at an incredible rate and we're leaving for our trip next weekend already. Today I had a day off alone. I took the opportunity to sleep in 'til 8am, which is totally refreshing when you're used to getting up at 5am to ride your bike in the dark four miles to work to stir olives. I visited the museum of contemporary art, a museum that xtina doesn't always care for so it's best I go alone. The exhibition right now is 'sympathy for the devil' - pieces pertaining to the intersection of art and rock music. Really, it wasn't so much visual art + rock as it was 'art rock.' If you're a fan of the velvet underground, you should check it out. I spent about three hours in one exhibition (due to all the video installations). Like most exhibits at the mca, it's all concept and very little focus.

I have new albums from beirut, iron and wine, bishop allen, sea wolf, devendra banhart and several others. It'll take me a while to get through them. But that's what thirty hours in the car is for.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

That's Right - A New Design


I have just finished working for the day and am about to enjoy a couple consecutive days off. First, new bar on the north side with some new/old friends, hot dougs tomorrow for lunch and a birthday party tomorrow night with becky. I can't wait. We'll have a great mid-week weekend.

My landlords/downstairs neighbors are on vacation. I get a few days rest from cigarette smoke, loud CNN and elderly marital bickering usually envolving things like the appropriate way to turn off a garden hose. I'm hoping that by the time I'm seventy five I'll have run out of things to yell at xtina about. In all honesty, they aren't bad neighbors or landlords and their antics are well worth it to live here.

We have decided on a vacation destination for mid October...Great Smoky Mountain National Park. It isn't exactly on the way home from kansas city but it'll be warm enough and we finally have enough money saved to be able to go somewhere fun. We have our site reserved and everything. Site C63, here we come!

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

block party


This weekend marked the 11th annual hideout block party. Xtina and I were in attendance with some new friends. Among the headliners were Andrew Bird and the Frames. My favorite act was mucca pazza. Becky, you were right about mucca pazza this whole time and I'm sorry I didn't go see them with you sooner.

Things are fine at work. It appears I didn't get the position at NW law - I'm not particularly surprised at this. I'm having a hard time applying for something new as I'm not actually aspiring to do something else. I simply don't know what else I could do. At least I have a job and I'm making an income doing something. All in all, I don't have too many complaints.

It's markedly cooler in the city today. The air is more crisp and I'm ready to spend some quality time in the outdoors. The family camping trip will be made, this year, in-conjunction with the Garcia-Campbell wedding in beautiful Kansas City. The problem is - there isn't much to do around that area and we can't exactly camp in the rockies in mid october. The plan at this point is to return to Great Smoky Mountain National Park - which isn't on the way to anything. Does anyone have any other ideas? The Ozarks, perhaps? Dogpatch, USA?

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

beer run


Last night Xtina and I took a spontaneous trip to the Three Floyds brewery located in an industrial corridor in beautiful munster, indiana. The trip was prompted by my department at the store getting two cases of three floyds' Gumballhead delivered and immediately disbursed to those working at the time. The beer is incredible, people. I'm talking about life-changing good beer. The delivery was notable due to the fact that we can never get the product in because demand for their beer far outweighs supply.

I had the Romulus and the Drunk Monk, Xtina the Milk Stout (highly recommended, she adds behind me) and the Gorch Fock. The best of all is Gumballhead, buy Gumballhead.

Today we both have the day off of work. So far we have spent it reading the newspaper and watching Oprah's two year anniversary expose on hurricane Katrina. In a few minutes we will go grocery shopping and hot dog eating. Oh wait, that link says the restaurant is closed. I guess we'll go somewhere else. Where else can I get a good Veggie Hot Dog in this town?

Monday, August 27, 2007

new tunes, summer plans

Based on the recommendations of several individuals, Xtina and I are starting 'Freaks and Geeks: the complete series' on DVD. I'll be sure to give a full rundown when we're finished, as we've only seen the pilot thus far.

I'm going into work everyday and doing my best. I still enjoy the people with whom I work but I'm still casually looking for something else. It's been hard working up the motivation to apply to more jobs, despite the terrible schedule I've been on; it seems I have things back in order. I have a nice place to live, I'm getting back into music again (seek out the new Caribou album) and I can't imagine feeling the way I did only a few month ago.

We're planning a trip to beautiful Kansas City - on the Kansas side for Zach's wedding. From there we're considering camping in the smoky mountains but that has yet to be determined. Besides that we don't have many plans. A summer vacation is better late than never.

Be sure to read Metal's newly-maintained blog as he galavants about his new hometown - the city of brotherly love.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Rookie of the Month

This morning at my 6:30am all-store meeting, I was voted on as a full-fledged team member as well as given the store "Rookie of the Month" award - and a $50 gift card. So, things are going well at the store and I seem to be shedding my superiority complex on the jobsite (after all, I went to Calvin College). Out of nowhere, however, I have been granted a phone interview for a good position with Northwestern Law. I'm super conflicted about the job, should it be offered to me, but my general idea is that I should choose a different career path than my spouse and use my degree in something more useful than explaining the subtle differences between Brie de Meux and Brie de Nangis. I've also been riding my bike to work three and a half miles each way every day. It actually takes only slightly longer by bike than by car. It's refreshing and gets me ready for the day. I'm earning money and feeling better than I have in a long time. I think I'm getting back to myself - this year finally seems to be over.

In other news I've recently started downloading music again. I just got the new Beirut e.p. and Spoon's new one: ga ga ga ga ga. I like them both upon first listen. Perhaps I'll give a review on a later date.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

the new place

We're in the new apartment now. The move, exhausting and tedious, went fine. Boxes are still littering the kitchen and the smell with which we were greeted is now beginning to fade. I can't believe the amount of space - and light! I think we'll enjoy being here; solving a few minor plumbing problems will help. It's so quiet. Logan Square is a wonderful, safe neighborhood, though lacking the dining and entertainment options we grew accustomed to in bucktown.

I leave for work in a couple hours and I'm trying to find constructive ways to spend my time as Xtina is working the morning shift today. Working at Whole Foods is going well - I'm surprised how much I like it. I work with some great people and I'm learning interesting things about fine cheese. My parents think I should stay here as a career position but I can't say I'm terribly satisfied with working in a grocery store, giving up my nights and weekends and serving customers. I must say I've been somewhat offended at my parents comments; sure, they just want me to be content and I know I have difficulty in that department, but I'd like to believe that my own parents would think I'm destined for better things than the service sector. Now I have to find my way out. I've stopped applying for outside jobs for the moment. The people are so great I couldn't up and leave weeks after starting, but I'm afraid the longer I wait the less chance I have of getting a job outside the service sector. The graduate school search is at a standstill - I don't know what to study and I don't have the guts to pick something and go.

But for the moment, I'm fine. I'm making money, eating and sleeping well. We got our couch yesterday, ending a two year search for such an item.

Discovery I'm most excited about: wifi signal! It's low and slow, but works.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

address changes, moving vans, 12 month aged manchego

Perhaps this has been the most unique week in my Chicago tenure. I started working at whole foods this week. I got to a point where I needed to get out of the house and start earning a living and whole foods was definitely the best option considering the circumstances. My new job seems to be going well - I work with some great people and I'm learning more about the worlds' fine cheeses than I thought was possible. I'm not too keen on the 4:30am wake up calls, my lack of nights, mornings and weekends, embarrassing ill-fitting uniforms and snooty rich folks who got the jobs that I didn't, but at least I'm a member of the workforce and I've got a bit of cash on hand.

This week I saw The Decemberists in a free show with the Grant Park Symphony Orchestra. I was a bit disappointed by the show - the marriage of indie rock and orchestra didn't seem to mesh as was intended. The Tribune agreed. The turnout was incredible - 15,000 people (who were able to get in the door). I was fortunate to have a wife who was willing to kill her afternoon sitting in line so we could sit in the 25th row. We rode our bikes home in the pouring rain and Xtina's harry potter book got ruined (no, not the new one). I made fun of her for reading harry potter. The following evening we saw the free taping of "wait wait don't tell me," also in the Pritzker Pavilion in Millenium Park. The show was good but the panelists where somewhat mediocre. We thought the show would have done well to include our favorite panelist - Paula Poundstone or perhaps Mo Rocca.

We stop by our new apartment today and pay the first month's rent. We move this coming Tuesday. We are so far from being ready; I think we're both so busy we're a little in denial about it's impending stress.

Monday, July 09, 2007

back to town

I think I'm going to come back to town for a while this week. I need to decompress for a bit. Also, I need to catch metal before he becomes the next one to skip town. Xtina is working like crazy these days and I wouldn't see her much anyway. I've been married for over two years now and this will be the first time we've slept apart since being wed.

Not much else to say around here. Pitchfork is this coming weekend and the weather should be better than it has been. Next weekend we can move into our new place - such an idea brings so many worries for me I prefer not to think about it.

Our landlord has our current apartment listed with two different agencies right now and they're parading people through our stuff almost daily. They're having a hard time renting it - it doesn't help that he raised the rent and it was overpriced before.

Friday, June 29, 2007

moving time again

We signed on a new apartment last week. It's 2bedrooms plus office over 1,200 square feet. And while it's a little hacked-up, there are some charms like original woodwork and hutch. The place is much, much better than our current place - and the same price. It does mean that we have to move neighborhoods, however, from bucktown to logan square about 1.5 miles northwest. We're pretty excited about it but I can't get myself to start on the terrible ordeal that is the moving process.

I've been waking up absurdly early lately. For the last couple of weeks I've been getting up anytime between 5:30 and 7 and sitting on the couch staring at the ten-minute morning news loop until I can convince myself to eat something, shower and hit the library. It's a strange feeling, getting up that early and not doing anything. I feel like I'm there while everyone else gets up, in intervals people all over the city wake, ready themselves, and go to work. And I'm there - in one way at least. Like I'm watching all this happen without ever seeing a soul. I think this has been happening because xtina has me on these homeopathic mood-altering pills. I tell her, "homeopathic? That means it doesn't work, right?" She decided I should try them after I became so depressed I couldn't make decisions on my own anymore - I would freak out just tying to decide what to have for dinner. I feel like they're doing something to me emotionally, but whether or not they're 'working' has yet to be determined.

Doing something about it is probably the best move as I was unable to even apply for jobs or deal with temp agencies anymore. But can you blame me; a year of unemployment, four temp agencies and 75+ mostly entry level jobs applied to at several different sites. I haven't worked a full week all year. I've worked eight part-time weeks in '07. I'm closing-in on getting a job with whole foods - it isn't how I want to spend my calvin education and I'll miss my nights, weekends and holidays, but I'm looking forward to working for a paycheck and getting my life back. I'm so tired of looking for work, I can't go to craigslist without cringing and I'm still dreaming of that awful job experience almost every night.

We don't have any plans to come back to GR at the moment. I suppose if it were up to me I'd already be there. We'll probably make a move like last time and show up unannounced and bum around town for a couple of days. Now that we're moving in to a bigger place and can put people up, we'd like to have people come down and visit more often. Anytime you need a place to stay in chicago, just give me a call.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Zoo Adventure 2K7

Yesterday, Xtina had the day off so we decided to go to Lincoln Park Zoo for the afternoon. We were hoping to see the rare baby wolf bred into captivity but we couldn't find it.

First we walked through the entrance and I begged xtina to let me rent a paddleboat shaped like a swan - she said no:



The tiger was sleeping:



I scared off the lion with my cat-like ferociousness:



After being kicked out of the zoo, Xtina took some pictures of flowers in the conservatory before the battery died:





Now I'm at my local public library watching a mashup of 'do the right thing' and 'sesame street' in ten second increments to keep myself from laughing.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

anniversary excursion

On Monday Xtina and I decided we should visit GR - thirty minutes later we were on the road. She had tuesday and wednesday off for our anniversary: two years as of yesterday - what more romantic and exotic locale than my parents house in west michigan! And while it was our most spontaneous trip to GR, it was one of the most fulfilling. Plans came together and we were able to see Peter in his natural environment, as well as Jason and Sarah. Nick - I hope you're feeling better, Jason had told us you didn't look so good.

I've decided that I have to make some work of getting back to school - I'm giving some serious consideration to library science (a field I was planning on going into before this terrible move interrupted my life as it has). I'll be honest - I'm pretty lost, I haven't a clue what I'm doing. I'm sure it's been easy to see from the outside but now that I've come to the realization I can take a job at whole foods or something and work on getting my life together.

I have an interview with a large employee benefits corporation next week. I'm not sure it's what I want so I decided to be honest in the phone interview. I said I'm not a 'suit and tie' person and that I don't work terribly fast during the phone interview and they scheduled a face-to-face anyway. I'll check it out. The pay isn't great. I've also applied to Northwestern's library and the Chicago public library - even if I get either position it will take them months to hire me.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

...and shove it

Well, so much for that idea. Yesterday I quit my job. And yes, I'm disappointed that it didn't work out, but not disappointed that I won't be returning to that office again. I'd prefer not to get into details regarding my terms of departure, but I will say that it became appearant already on the second day that I didn't want to be with the organization and it became clear to them they didn't want me there. In fact, they said some things to me that I'm having a hard time shaking. I think every young 21st century male wants to believe that passing words won't effect him, but I'll admit that I tend to take things personally.

The point is: I've got to figure something out because this clearly isn't working.

I don't want to do this temp-agency bs again. I think I'm going to apply for whole foods and come up with a more dynamic plan. Perhaps I need to be back in school.

Saturday, May 05, 2007

smokestacks and skyscrapers

I started the new job this week. I went immediately from working at the MS Society on Monday to the non-profit consulting firm Tuesday. And while I don't want to entirely devulge how I feel the new position is going, I can say I have mixed feelings. Perhaps it's the first week, perhaps it's my place in life, but I'm not completely convinced. Maybe I built it up as the job that I would be ecstatic to start each morning - to lift me out of boredom and make sense of my life. I'm considering alternative ways to be honest about it. I guess what I'm most disappointed about is the fact that nothing can just be okay - I'm sure it's just as much me as it is the job climate. I understand that it seems at times that I complain about everything, but I don't write here to paint a rosey picture of how things are going - I can do that with relatives without this aid. I think increasingly I'm more confused about what I want to do with my life in general and each new thing I start I want it to resolve that feeling while I know that's simply not possible.

I've become increasingly frustrated with the city. Chicago is a playground for the wealthy and a metal trap for the down-and-out. I realized last week that assuming safety, I would rather live among relative poverty that relative wealth. I'm tired of wealthy people in my neighborhood raising their noses as I pass, doing everything in their power to avoid eye contact. I'm sick of people who feel the world owes them something - those who live in luxury with no consideration for those around them and how they effect their immediate surroundings. Also, I don't like being made to feel small and subsequently being forced to feel large. I'm beginning to see the appeal in a life of isolation in the country.

I purchased the new 'Feist' album this week. I'm surprised by the disagreement among critics. Pitchfork gave it an 8.8, all songs considered called it the best music of her career, while the guys at 'sound opinions' had very little good to say about it. I think it's good - I feel more could have been done to make it a better album - amplify it's positive traits. I still like 'let it die' better. Recently I've also purchased an 'antony and the johnsons' album and I'm planning on purchasing the new wilco and rufus wainwright discs upon their release.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Shoddy Umbrellas, Life Under Netflix

This morning I awoke to find the city covered in a thick layer of shit. I'm not sure how xtina got to work as she left me our one household umbrella which happened to turn inside out on my way to the bus stop - in the comical fashion that it does on television weather reports and commercials for jamaica. Work is feeling like bethany today. I've got my ipod plugged into the speakers and my only source of tasks was an hour and a half late this morning.

In netflix news- justin has accepted my friend invitation. I like this feature so if anyone reading this has a netflix account, we can be netflix bff. We recently watched 'Time Indefinite,' another film from Ross McElwee - a documentary filmmaker we're into these days. If you haven't seen anything from him, get 'Sherman's March.' We also liked 'Half Nelson,' despite it teetering on the cliched theme of "teacher learns from students as students learn from teacher." I loved, however, just how brokenness of the protagonist and dialogue and setting. Beautiful. Also, we are the last two people in the country to fall in love with 'Six Feet Under.' The show, not the metal band. One season down, four to go.

Yesterday, in a rare occurance, Xtina and I had the same day off. We walked through the neighborhood. I purchased a french connection blazer from crossroads trading co. ($15!)and Xtina bought "a heartbreaking work of staggering genious" by dave eggers because the more I think about it, the more I liked it. Finally, we went to a local tatoo parlor (religious iconography themed) and, after 6 1/2 years, got my earring taken out. I'm not sure why I was nervous, he simply grabbed it and popped it out - In an establishment with which I have nothing in common by a young man with whom I have nothing in common. My new job requires that I can't have it in case we meet with "a more conservative philanthropist." She was, on the phone, very apologetic about it and concerned that I was offended they would even suggest the removal. I was not.

This Friday is Ben's 'Friday the Thirteenth' party. I'm hoping it will take me back to the days of social optimism I experienced upon moving here. I need to meet some new people. Next Wednesday Xtina and I are going to see the Decemberists and My Brightest Diamond and the immediately following Friday (20-22) we will be returning to Grand Rapids for the weekend. We hope to see you there. Yes you.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

the prophesy fulfilled

If you are one of my myspace 'friends' then you probably already know: I Got A Job! I won't go into too much detail right now but it's with a small firm located in my neighborhood that consults npo's and philanthropists in various managerial and operational issues. Thanks to all of you who put up with me complaining about being broke. We should go to the bar and celebrate!

In other news on the homefront: Beginning this weekend we will be babysitting my 17 year old "establishment-hating" younger brother. And while I'm a little relieved that he isn't 18 (can't drag me along to rage/punk/emo/rock shows full of kids from wilmette mad at their parents) it puts me at a great disadvantage in terms of finding things we can do that we'll all enjoy. I'm fine with museums, but he didn't sound as keen on the idea. Suggestions? Let me know-

Friday, March 09, 2007

part two

I caved and bought a tv last night. It's a 27 inch sharp flatscreen less than three years old: $100. I know, I know, I didn't want to spend that much, but everyone on craigslist wanted to sell me their tv's in a week and a half (why post it, then?). We got the phone call last night and drove to lakeview to pick it up, spending about thirty minutes trying to find a place to park - why I live on the west side. Some young couple in a new condo that xtina and I agreed "do something." We could never be friends with these poeple, and they clearly thought us to be strange. Very little eye contact was made and we were in and out in seconds. We lugged it down the stairs and out to the street (they never offered to help) and soon realized that it was not going to fit in the car. This is a much larger television than I thought it would be. After shoving and maneuvering, a spark on my hand and calling andrew for help, we get it in the front seat and drive carefully home. We set it up in the living room - it looks obtrusive - we are now 'tv people.' There is discoloration on the screen. We are upset and saddened - maybe not just for the television, but for the culumative feeling of not being able to do anything without problems. This morning the discoloration was gone. And I was rejected for another job in which I was described as a 'sure thing.' I saw the description. I'm overqualified. They insist I'm 'not a strong candidate.' And so it continues... I've taken a part-time temporary job with a foundation for a disease. The tax return wasn't what we were planning and I should get out of the house anyway.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

and now our tv is broken

This morning xtina attempted to turn on the television and the tv was unresponsive. This led me to pace nervously between the living room and kitchen, back and forth - kitchen, living room. After plugging it into several outlets I was able to concede - I'm sorry, she's gone. I never got a chance to say goodbye. Now what will I do for six hours a day? The early morning was spent at various low-end electronics stores. I simply can't spend $150 for a tv that isn't as good as the one I had. I've emailed a dozen people on craigslist with used tv's for sale - then again, we all know my luck with anything craigslist. What's next? A complimenary kick in the groin? I know, it's just a tv - but it's more than that - it's the culmination of many things, the tv just being the most recent. I'm trying to get something together before american idol tonight at seven.

Movies:

Sophie Scholl: the final days: fantastic
The Passenger: not very good
Tideland: terrible

Friday, February 23, 2007

through a cellophane window

Last weekend xtina and I returned to our native city. We loved seeing all those we got a chance to see. 'Props' to nick and brooke for putting us up. we desparately needed a weekend away from chicago and all the problems associated with our situation.

This week:

2 more rejections (of which one was "in the bag")
1 more temp agency joined (3 total and I haven't worked since x-mas)
5 weekdays I haven't left the house
17 hours at the library - which feels more like an office
8 jobs applied for
1 new resume created
1 meeting nervously arranged with executive dad vaguely knows but promised I'd call


Last night I dreamt that I received, as a gift, a box (about two cubic feet) with a cellophane window and animals painted on the outside. I opened the box and laid it's contents on the rug. Out poured live animals: 1 small cat, 1 small bird, 1 small horse, and 2 small dogs. They were tired from the box and cellophane. They ran around my living room in a motion very much like that in 'the science of sleep.' And I cried because I felt bad for the animals - somehow I knew they were raised in a lab and led miserable lives and also because I couldn't take care of them and the giver of this gift simply didn't understand.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

guest voice in my head: john waters





I can't seem to get this out of my head. The song was featured on 'all songs considered' in their 'guest dj john waters' episode.

In other news, I will be returning to grand rapids this weekend - don't worry, I'm not expecting any cake.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

lonely rivers flow to the sea

Hi folks. I know it's been a while since I last wrote. The truth is I was withholding writing another post until I had some very good news to report. I couple of weeks ago I believed I was close to this but after what I believed to be an outstanding interview my calls are not being returned. For a time I got my hopes up and believed that by getting employed in what I could classify as 'dream job,' all the feelings of loss could be resolved - also, we could get out of our freezing tiny apartment sooner than later. And I refuse to believe these things happen to me because I 'don't pray hard enough.' The truth of the matter is... I am humiliated. Almost six months in a city of three million people and I'm jobless. The very thought that potential employers are calling references of mine I haven't seen in six months is embarrasing.

Since my last post not too much has happened. We didn't go home for christmas, instead we walked from our apartment to the magnificent mile and downtown. The city was abandoned. I took photos that day and the day prior - you can view them here. This holiday season felt less like christmas than any in memory - but that's another depressing post I decided not to write.

I finished 'the devil in the white city.' Afterwards I drove to graceland cemetary to visit my favorite characters and chicago magnates. Next time the weather gets warmer I'll go to jackson park and soak in the site. Next I may finally get around to reading 'the great gatsby.' sorry karl.

Tonight Xtina and I will be seeing Ryan Adams in concert at the house of blues. It will be the first event we've attended since moving. I received the tickets as a present from my mother. I can't wait but I'm afraid xtina won't enjoy it as the show will be starting when she normally goes to bed - and she has to get up at her usual time to go to work the next morning.

We've watched four hours of american idol in the last two days. I've always loved the first round (embarrasingly, because it is unrepentantly low-brow) but this season I have different feelings about the tone-deaf. Maybe on some level I relate to their rejection - their high hopes and certainty being systematically crushed. It didn't help the comparison when christina likened my singing that of the young man in seattle last night who sang 'unchained melody' by the righteous brothers.