sobriety=bad dreams

Lately I haven't been drinking as much as I had during interim and the first week of the semester. Because of this, and other factors such as my schedule, I haven't been sleeping as well as I had. I usually roll around waiting fall into slumber for about an hour before actually doing so. Also, I've been having very vivid dreams. However, because of my pessimistic nature my dreams are usually frightening and reflect worrysome thoughts I try to suppress while I'm awake. I fell asleep last night worrying about a possible need for a surgery that I've run out of time to have under my parents' health insurance. I dreamt the root of my problem was a cancerous tumor and I had to have surgery immediately. Christina and I weren't able to obtain health insurance because of my cancer (the irony of privatized health care) and we were, in effect, ruined. We lived in squalor and she resented me for the duration of our lives for crushing her aspirations. I also dreamt an alternative outcome where I cancelled the wedding in lieu of having the surgery which also made her quite mad. This morning I was engaging in my normal routine of drinking coffee while watching the today show and called me. She never calls me in the morning. I told her what I had dreamt. we both cried. now I'm at school.